Abstractions of the Interpersonal

I think it’s interesting that so many people participated in the 25 Random Things survey on Facebook.  Not only did it become viral, it spawned a plethora of articles in mainstream media.  Most people hate chain letters.  Nowadays, if you get a chain letter via email forwarded to you, you don’t even read it, it immediately gets deleted, at least this is the case for me.  But the 25 Things list was different, it took off.      But why?  Why did so many people engage and take part in this self-disclosure?

Self-disclosure is a special kind of conversation in which we give someone a glimpse of who we are, and in turn, they give a glimpse back.  This exchange of self-disclosure is how we build relationships.  Intimacy and trust are formed.  After all, we are social beings.  So it isn’t surprising that so many people participated in the survey.

But, instead of oooing and awwwing over how many people took part, what if we looked at it from a different angle?  For instance, what if we looked at how the role of gender plays in this self–disclosure game.  Theories of gender role socialization suggest that males learn to inhibit their emotions, while society encourages females to express them. (Lindsey 1997)  According to one study, women are more likely to initiate self-disclosure than men are (Arliss 1991).  Could this be the reason that I received more 25 Things lists from my female friends on FB than my male friends?  Obviously, I don’t have a large enough data set to draw any conclusions, but it brings up how we can look at what’s going on in social media from a different perspective. 

Social networking is creating a wealth of data that we can use to learn about ourselves, our relationships, our society, our government, our companies, etc.  We just have to take a step back from seeing it tactically and as mundane status updates, but really see what’s going on here.  Could the studies of social psychology, anthropology and sociology be applied to the way we interact via digital media?  The examples above were based on studies about building relationships through conversation, how do those studies change when there’s a computer and a cloud in the mix or do they?    

So yes, people want to feel a part of something, whether it is a relationship, a team, or even a toothpaste community, people want to be social.  My theory on why so many people took the time to fill out the survey and pass it around….in the end, people want to be known and understood just a little more. 

 

Good tweets, Good status, Good evening,

ladunkin

 

 

References:

Lindsey, L.L. 1997. Gender Roles: A Sociological Perspective.  Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall

Arliss, L.P. 1991. Gender Communication. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall

Pull Up a Chair

What’s up with Supper Table 2.0?  One of my favorite things is to go to dinner with friends and discuss current topics, philosophical ideas, analysis of life, etc.  I’ve threatened many times to start having dinner parties where a diverse group of people come together and discuss a topic pulled from a hat, all viewpoints welcomed.  However, I haven’t taken the plunge on that one because with my cooking I’m afraid that there wouldn’t be a second dinner party to plan!  Also, I glamorize the idea of the 1950’s family all sitting down at 6:00PM to have dinner together and discuss the day’s happenings and current news landscape.  So I decided in this ever decreasing economy the cheapest way to have my dinner parties and not make anyone sick from my domestic abilities (or lack thereof) in the kitchen I’d create Supper Table 2.0.  Everything else is 2.0 these days, Web 2.0, Enterprise 2.0 Gov 2.0, Nonprofits 2.0, etc. hence Supper Table 2.0! So I hope you’ll pull up a chair at my Supper Table and engage in intriguing conversation as we broach different topics.  (Just a note, because I’m a student of social media and am absorbed and fascinated by this space, most of my topics will be in this area.)

"Ideal conversation must be an exchange of thought, and not, as many of those who worry most about their shortcomings believe, an eloquent exhibition of wit or oratory.  Happily for most of us, it is not necessary to have any very special gift of cleverness to be a person with whom others are delighted to talk." Emily Post, Etiquette ©1950

Getting Back to My Existential Ways

So I’m finally doing this, I’ve held out and held out, but I’ve decided to try my hand at blogging.  I haven’t blogged before because I’m quite honestly scared of it.  Why would anyone want to read anything I have to write? Why would anyone care about my thoughts on any particular topic? Haven’t most things already been done or said or thought of?  I’ve already written these first few sentences about ten times, write, delete, self-edit, repeat.   Trying to make it “perfect” whatever that means, wondering whose on the other end of the cloud, maybe no one, maybe a few family members, maybe many…..oh the unknown.

In my career it has been ingrained in me to always think of your audience first, who are they, what do they want to know, what do you want them to take away?  How do you answer those questions when you’re sitting in your basement writing a post to the unknown.  So I promise nothing.  This is my experiment and challenge for me, to learn more about technology, using technology to build relationships, and expressing myself freely in written form. 

The last time I sat down and analyzed something I read or studied and then formulated an organized thoughtful written “essay,” if you will, was freshman year in undergrad.  Since then I’ve written thousands of emails and TPS reports, most in bullet point format, any writing capabilities or thought provoking analysis I had in high school have cobwebs.  I’ve been dumbed down to business speak and corporate fluff.  So this blog is my way to dust off those cobwebs.  Maybe one day I can live up to that “A” essay on Dante’s Inferno or that English project on The Crucible or those many papers on existentialism, well one can dream.  

Hello World

Just testing this whole new world out.